Julius Caesar (2002)

I've got to say that I love my historical sword and sandal dramas - and with Richard Harris and Christopher Walker in it, I was prepared to overlook the fact that this was cannibalised from a two-part mini-series with more investors than you can shake a stick at. Unfortunately, their choice in the title role - Jeremy Sisto - singularly failed to carry off the role. Caesar was renowned for his ability as an orator - he could sell sand to an Egyptian - but this one couldn't sell me a chocolate covered Jeremy Irvine. It's flat, episodically chronological and the characters are sterile; Pompey (Chris Noth) especially. These stories, in a made-for-television context, never compare well to their grand cinematographic counterparts - "Cleopatra" (1963) or "Julius Caesar" (1953) - so why try? If you know nothing about Roman history then it might just put a few names into your head for further reading, but otherwise forget it...