Piranha (1978)

Not a terrible film, but there was a remake in the 90s with the exact same story featuring better acting and better effects, so you can probably skip straight ahead to that one. Now I know that if I had been around when that remake came out, I'd probably be the first in line to complain "Why'd you even bother? It's just the first movie over again!", but seeing as I watched them both in retrospect, I can ignore the fact that I'm being a total hypocrite and move right ahead to recommending you just watch the remake. _Final rating:★★ - Had some things that appeal to me, but a poor finished product._

Adventuresome and fun "Jaws" homage with far superior women RELEASED IN 1978 and directed by Joe Dante, “Piranha” chronicles events when genetically-enhanced piranha are accidently released into a river system in central Texas, which threaten kids & counselors at a Summer Camp and vacationers at a lake resort. A spirited skip tracer (Heather Menzies) and a backwoods drunkard (Bradford Dillman) team-up to save the swimmers. Kevin McCarthy and Barbara Steele play military scientists who experimented with the escaped piranha. While "Piranha" is sort of a "Jaws" (1975) knockoff, it’s different enough to not be a rip-off: The story takes place in a river system deep in the mainland and not the ocean; the ‘monster’ consists of teams of little vicious fish rather than a huge Great White Shark; the beach sequences involve quaint campground-like beaches rather than major ocean beaches; unlike “Jaws,” there’s a focus on alluring young women, although “Jaws 2” (1978) delivered the goods in this area as well; there’s more of a sense of adventure and even suspense; and the tone mixes-in amusing elements with the horrific mayhem. As inferred, the picture is highlighted by several quality females with curvy Belinda Balaski (from "The Howling") and cutie Melody Thomas Scott (from The Young and the Restless) featured in prominent roles. Moreover, voluptuous Janie Squire has some worthy screen time in the prologue. There are superb women in the periphery as well. Interestingly, the 2010 quasi-remake, “Piranha 3D,” took the sleaze route with loads of nudity, but the women are ironically hotter here, not to mention the film’s all-around more entertaining. THE MOVIE IS LEAN and filler-free at 93 minutes and was shot along a river near San Marcos in the heart of Texas, Northeast of San Antonio. WRITERS: John Sayles and Richard Robinson. GRADE: A-

Decent watch, probably won't watch again, but can recommend for fans of Jaws or any other version of this movie. There is a 1995 remake of this movie that I would probably watch instead if I wanted to watch this gain. Not-trigger warning: There is a surprising LACK of gore in this movie. This has a decent story to it, but it shares aspects with Jaws, Friday the 13th, other movies of the era. Particularly the "hide the effect" routine that Jaws made famous. The practical effects aren't very good, which is why the best use of them was to hide the fish whenever possible. In a way, it really works if the threat is massive, unstoppable, and nearly invisible. The whole "secret government project" angle is a little irritating as this crossed my movie watching with my "otherworldy research": things like this are presented in movies as an absurd idea when they are reality. Maybe not to this extent, but as the government used to claim Area 51 didn't exist, that should prove my point. They cast was fine, I didn't see any problems, and I didn't see anything extra-ordinary from them. This isn't a bad movie, there are just so many better things to watch, including the re-make, I guess.

**Piranha is bad 70s creature feature gold! It's so bad it's great and a fun ride as long as you expect a total cheesefest.** Piranha is cheesy 70s/80s creature films at their very best! It has everything - evil military generals, obligatory lake celebrations, scientific experimentation gone wrong, horrible dialogue, low-budget effects, and more. It's clear as you watch the film that Piranha was heavily influenced by Jaws, with the city ignoring the warnings of the dangerous underwater creature, the very similar movie poster, and much more. Steven Spielberg has even named it his favorite Jaws rip-off movie. This low-budget gem was a zeitgeist of creature horror cinema of the decade that didn't allow bad effects, poor acting, or no money to stop them from making their movies. The remakes in the 2000's just used this movie as an excuse to show a lot of nudity, and while there is a little nudity in Piranha (1978), it is much briefer than its predecessors. Pirahna (1978) focuses on letting the army of hungry fish gnaw on its helpless victims. This goofy little creature flick launched the career of director Joe Dante, who later collaborated with Steven Spielberg himself to make Gremlins - a real creature masterpiece! Piranha is no Gremlins, but it sure is a fun start to Dante's creepy creature-filled career.

"People eat fish, fish don't eat people"! Well, that might be the theory but when a meddlesome couple accidentally release a swimming pool's worth of genetically modified fish into a river, we discover that that mantra isn't strictly true! It's only because "Dr. Hoak" (Kevin McCarthy) is at the facility that our interfering pair - "Maggie" (Heather Menzies-Ulrich) and "Paul" (Bradford Dillman) learn of the potential disaster scenario looming - especially when they realise that there is a water park down the river populated with loads of noisy, bitesized, tourists just perfect for their peckish predators. Can they get down the river in time to stop carnage ensuing? On that front - well, there's not a hint of jeopardy but along the way Joe Dante does manage to create a slight sense of menace. The photography and slightly "Psycho"-esque score at times do make this occasionally a little uncomfortable to watch. That said - the acting is pretty woeful, as is the rather pedestrian dialogue and the special effects are not going to keep Ray Harryhausen awake at night. It might work quite well in a cinema, though, at Halloween after a couple of bottles of Wild Turkey. It's a fun, throw-away, adventure that swipes a little at the military meddling in the affairs of science and is actually quite entertaining. Aim low and you won't be disappointed.