Timber Falls (2007)

**Cheap, Stupid, and Completely Lacking in Originality** Wow, what a waste of time this film was. It's not just that the movie constantly sinks to B-movie levels and makes a fool of itself with poorly done, low-budget splatter scenes. The story is pure nonsense! Anyone who has a problem with seeing Christian symbols dragged through the mud should stay far away from this one. And that’s probably the only reason anyone would watch this film on purpose, with the intention and knowledge of what they’re getting into: if they have a grudge against Christian symbolism. But even that wouldn't be enough to overlook the terrible story and the cheap, uninspired direction. I doubt there's much to spoil about the "story" itself, but here goes: a couple goes hiking in the mountains, away from civilization, and gets kidnapped, tortured, and so on by religious fanatics. The film's biggest weakness lies in its "villains." On one hand, they’re portrayed as Bible fanatics, yet on the other, they seem perfectly fine with breaking almost every commandment in the Bible (lying, stealing, mudering, coveting, etc.). If you're looking for a film in this genre, just watch Texas Chainsaw Massacre or something in the same league, because this one rips off those films continuously. My recommendation: hands off!