Tough and Deadly (1995)

Tough and Deadly loses many tough points when we consider that Roddy Piper’s character’s name is Elmo Freech (doesn’t quite have the same ring to it as Sam Hell or John Nada, does it), or that his co-star is Billy Blanks, whose last name accurately describes his personality — or lack thereof. The movie itself doesn't leave a very lasting impression, because anything resembling a logical plot has been eschewed in favor of a string of fight scenes one after another. I mean, there’s both a bar fight and a pool hall fight, and when the heroes aren’t fighting the bad guys, they’re fighting each other. Moreover, an inordinate number of people fall to their deaths in the course of these fights; they fall off ledges, over railings, and through windows. Remember how Scott Pilgrim said he once kicked a guy so hard he saw the curvature of the Earth? Something kinda like that is going on here; Elmo punches this one guy so hard that the dude not only lands quite a ways away, but then continues gaining yardage, so to speak, by rolling over on the ground. Through events not worth recounting, Elmo takes in an amnesiac Billy Blanks, who chooses a new name by throwing a knife at a map; the knife lands on Portland, to which Billy adds the first name John. John Portland. Why not Cleveland Brown? It hadn’t been taken yet. Elmo and John then proceed to prowl the city streets kicking asses and taking names — well, not so much taking names, but you get the idea. The random fighting scenes are only interrupted when the film cuts to a bunch of CIA agents (one of them played by Jackie Chiles), who have no problem identifying themselves as such and generally drawing attention — at one point even driving with a siren on — and behaving in manner uncharacteristic for an agency accustomed to operating covertly. On the other hand, they do like to meet in pitch-dark rooms; however, this is probably just to save money on sets. Tough and Deadly is perfect for people who can’t get enough punching and kicking, which is so abundant here that it leaves no room for a Romantic Interest for either hero; then again, they have their little own bromance going; furthermore, methinks the filmmakers find violence itself erotic, and in that sense, this movie is a veritable orgy.